Why was I giving up school, anyway? Post partum depression? Me? Nah, it had been the sleep deprivation, that was all, now that I was sleeping better I felt really good!
Saturday came and out of nowhere, without reason, despite adequate sleep... I'm barely able to function. Anxiety attacks and being at the verge of tears over everything, tired as hell, angry, feeling hopeless. What the hell happened?
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I started this post yesterday morning. I managed to get some work and errands done, but still a lot is left to do. Now that I opened up about the PPD to some people, they are now asking if I'm taking medications and pushing/advicing I quit breastfeeding to take care of myself. Argggg.
Work hasn't let up -I took on a design project that is kicking my ass, and I'm remodeling a bathroom in my parents house on the side (with all the Dealing With My Dad As A Client that it entails), Mrs. T and H&C's houses are still ongoing and I have a very long overdue project for a recurrent client. I also owe Mrs. Prado some table cloths and Christmas decorations she ordered from my side business with Pam. Now, none of these things should take that long to finish, not really. But I can't seem to get them done, and that inhability is driving me insane. No matter how much I run around there's always more than half of my to-do list left at the end of the day.
This Saturday I went to K's house to replace the lamp shade and see if I could figure out why it wasn't turning on.
The lightbulb was out.
I didn't know if I should laugh or cry. Clients, man, I don't know. Are they functioning adults?
Am I? I can't deal with anything going slightly off program, let alone actual problems or arguments of any kind.
I need to shake this off. I just need to figure out how.
---
I started this post yesterday morning. I managed to get some work and errands done, but still a lot is left to do. Now that I opened up about the PPD to some people, they are now asking if I'm taking medications and pushing/advicing I quit breastfeeding to take care of myself. Argggg.
Work hasn't let up -I took on a design project that is kicking my ass, and I'm remodeling a bathroom in my parents house on the side (with all the Dealing With My Dad As A Client that it entails), Mrs. T and H&C's houses are still ongoing and I have a very long overdue project for a recurrent client. I also owe Mrs. Prado some table cloths and Christmas decorations she ordered from my side business with Pam. Now, none of these things should take that long to finish, not really. But I can't seem to get them done, and that inhability is driving me insane. No matter how much I run around there's always more than half of my to-do list left at the end of the day.
This Saturday I went to K's house to replace the lamp shade and see if I could figure out why it wasn't turning on.
The lightbulb was out.
I didn't know if I should laugh or cry. Clients, man, I don't know. Are they functioning adults?
Am I? I can't deal with anything going slightly off program, let alone actual problems or arguments of any kind.
I need to shake this off. I just need to figure out how.
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